


The Way Your Heart Moves

by b0n3l3ssm1lk



Series: Marvel One-Shots [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Adult Peter Parker, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Happy Ending, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-07
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:28:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24059749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/b0n3l3ssm1lk/pseuds/b0n3l3ssm1lk
Summary: "What have I done?" Tony asked out loud, not intending for there to be an answer. JARVIS responded anyway."You've just hired yourself an assistant. Congratulations."
Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: Marvel One-Shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1733512
Comments: 12
Kudos: 86





	The Way Your Heart Moves

**Author's Note:**

> TW: internalized homophobia
> 
> This work would suck if it wasn't beta read by the lovely fundamentalblue. Thank you.

"Tony, please," Peter begged as he bounded down the front steps. Tony was halfway to the car at the end of the driveway, hastily parked there by Happy after Tony had called him, shouting that he needed to leave town as soon as possible.

Peter walked as fast as he could, but he wasn't wearing shoes and the ground was slick from the thunderstorm that blew through the night before. 

"Please, don't do this. Don't leave." Peter could feel the tears streaming down his face. He felt pathetic, standing on the front steps in one of Tony's old tees and sobbing. 

"Please, I need you. Just come back, we can work this out." Peter was still walking after Tony, even though the older man was practically running down the driveway. He continued to sob and his vision started to get hazy with tears. Tony hadn't said a word to Peter all morning, just shouted on the phone before packing a suitcase and bounding down the stairs, pushing Peter out of the way when he tried to stop him. Peter winced thinking about it.

Peter was shivering. All he wanted was to wrap himself up in the arms of the man that was now steps away from getting in his car and driving off. 

"Tony," Peter called out, desperate for him to just turn around and look at him. Tony stopped walking and Peter saw him clench his hands into fists at his side. Peter took a step closer, now only a few feet away from Tony. He watched Tony's shoulders rise and fall rapidly as he gathered his breath. 

"Please, don't–" Peter started, but he was cut off when Tony whipped around and grabbed the front of his shirt. For one blissful second, Peter thought Tony might kiss him. That thought was squashed when he saw the anger in Tony's eyes.

"Get your shit and get out of my sight. When I come back you better not be here."

Tony released Peter and climbed into his car. He sped away, not even glancing at the trembling, weeping man he was leaving behind.

Peter dropped to his knees and gasped out more tears, huddling in on himself. _How could he let this happen?_

* * *

**1 year ago**

"Mr. Stark? The last one is here. Shall I send him up?"

Tony pulled his eyes away from the monitor and waved a hand to clear the holograms surrounding him. 

"Yeah Jarvis, go ahead and tell him I'm ready." He sighed and plopped himself down behind his desk, glad to be on the last interview of the day. Pepper had insisted that he get an assistant since she was leaving for DC and he "sure as hell couldn't run this place by himself." After several months of torture, he finally caved and started the interview process from the list she had produced for him, even though he didn’t plan on hiring anyone. He didn't need help.

He was pulled from his thoughts when he heard the door open. A small, young kid with brown hair came through the door and stood right in the middle of the room, looking around as if he found everything fascinating. He was wearing a button-down, which was tucked into his way-too-tight jeans. _Oh for crying out loud. This dude is a twink._

"This position is for adults, kid. Sorry." Tony stood up and motioned to the door.

The kid looked at him, confused. 

"I am an adult, sir." He extended his portfolio to Tony and smiled. Tony grabbed it and flipped it open, noticing the lack of papers inside. "I know I don't have much, but I just graduated and I wanted to jump right in to experience." Tony looked up and the kid was still grinning. It was adorable. _Wait, what?_

"Stop that."The kid's smile fell and Tony looked back down at the kid's portfolio. 

"Peter Parker?" The kid started to nod and then caught himself. 

"Yes, sir." He was blushing. 

"Interesting," Tony muses while skimming the rest of the file. Not much to really look at though. Just a high school transcript and a letter of recommendation from his high-school science teacher saying how great the boy was. Tony didn't care about any of it, but wanted to look like he was making an effort.

Peter was starting to tap his foot and bite his lip. Tony guessed it was from nerves. 

"Stop." Peter immediately ceased and stood up straight, staring right at Tony. Tony's brow furrowed. _What is wrong with this kid?_

"Why do you want to work for me?" He was always careful to say _for_ him instead of _with_ him. He didn't want anyone to think they were special enough to create alongside him. 

"I'm a huge fan of yours. I've been studying your work since I was a kid–" 

"You’re still a kid," Tony interrupted, closing the file and tossing it back at Peter. Peter dropped it and scrambled to pick it up with a frown on his face. 

"Sir, I assure you that my age is not a problem. I'm a really fast learner and I really love the work you are doing–" 

"Don't care," Tony turned his back to the boy, hoping he’d get the message and run out the door. The frown on Peter's face deepened and Tony thought the kid might start crying. _Why do twinks always have to be so sensitive?_ Tony had the inclination to smack him, and from the depths of his mind, an image of Howard doing the same to him floated into his mind's eye for a moment. He sat down behind his desk and looked up to see the kid was shaking and biting his lip, an absolute mess.

_That's a sight._

"Stop that." Peter immediately stopped, standing up straight and still and released his lip from his teeth. 

"Mr. Stark, please. Just let me prove to you that I can do this. I really think–" 

"You're hired."

Tony couldn't believe the words that had just come out of his mouth. _Did you really just hire this fag?_ The ghost of Howard’s voice was in the back of his head. Tony looked over at the boy, who was staring wide-eyed at him, his mouth hanging open. 

"I'll message you when I need you," he gestured to the door. "Please leave."

Peter scampered towards the door, but turned around just before leaving and said, "thank you, sir," before sprinting out the door. Tony sighed and put his head in his hands.

"What have I done?" Tony asked out loud, not intending for there to be an answer. JARVIS responded anyway. 

"You've just hired yourself an assistant. Congratulations."

* * *

**8 months ago**

Peter was trying to balance the coffees in one hand while using his other to send a series of texts to Mr. Stark. He knew they would never be read, but he had taken to texting him where he was at all times in case Mr.Stark was ever concerned that Peter was actually working. He seemed like the kind of boss who would come down hard on Peter if he slacked. Or maybe he’d worry something had happened to Peter. 

_Like that will ever happen._ Peter wove through the sidewalk traffic, dodging cars and bicycles. He was running late and didn’t want to upset Mr. Stark.

Peter had been Mr. Stark's assistant for about two months now, but was still stuck doing menial tasks like organizing drawers or running errands. It was mind-numbing.

"Why don't you ask him if you can get involved with his research?" MJ brought up when Peter had called her earlier in the week. Peter had laughed at that. Mr. Stark actively made sure that Peter never went near his lab. 

Peter had walked in once, during his first week. He was delivering an urgent file to Mr.Stark, but instead of thanking him, he yelled at him and dismissed him for a week. When he came back, Mr. Stark had put a new scanning system on the door to make sure he never got in again.

Peter felt raindrops hit his face and started walking faster, hoping to get back before the rain started to really come down; he didn't have a coat. Mr. Stark had also started telling Peter how to dress, claiming that Peter's outfits were distracting and disgusting. He was only allowed to wear neutral colors and loose-fitting garments. Peter hated the rule, and he was pretty sure it was illegal in some way, but bit his tongue every time Mr. Stark complained about his clothes, because he needed this job. 

Peter swept through the doors of Mr.Stark's building, just barely missing the torrent of rain that started falling. He rushed upstairs and knocked on Mr.Stark's office door. 

"Come in."

Mr.Stark was leaning back in his chair with his eyes closed. 

He was in this position a lot. 

Peter liked it when he was like this because Mr. Stark seemed almost calm and peaceful. Mr. Stark opened his eyes and looked over at Peter. 

"Are you just going to stand there all day?" Peter could feel himself blush and walked over to Mr. Stark's desk, handing him the coffees. He drank them in only a few gulps. Peter noticed how his throat moved when he swallowed and blushed even harder. _The way he moves is amazing._ He cursed under his breath before arguing with himself. _Shut up, he's your boss._

Mr. Stark noticed him staring and he narrowed his eyes. 

"Stop staring. I hate it." Peter averted his gaze and instead looked at the painting hanging behind Mr. Stark. 

"I need you to run over to the other building and grab a package. Pepper messaged me a few minutes ago. She'll be waiting for you." Tony leaned back in his chair again and closed his eyes. After a few moments, he opened one lid and looked at Peter. 

"Is there a reason you're still standing here?" Peter started to shake. 

"Sir, it's pouring out there." Mr. Stark opened his other eye and leaned forward. 

"And?" Peter was sweating now; he could feel the beads on his forehead. 

"It's a 40-minute walk sir. You want me to walk all the way there in this weather?" Mr. Stark stared at Peter for half a beat before replying. 

"Yes." He leaned back again and dismissed Peter from the room.

Peter was soaked by the time he walked up the steps to Mr. Stark's downtown building. Pepper buzzed him in and met him in the lobby. She was carrying a large white box and had a look of concern on her face. 

"Did you walk here?" Peter nodded, holding himself and shivering. 

"Oh, honey. Tony didn't ask Happy to give you a ride?" If Peter hadn't been so cold, he would've laughed. Mr. Stark never let him use the car, preferring Peter to run all of his errands by hand and foot. He picked up the white box, thanked Pepper, and started toward the door. 

"Wait!" Pepper called, stopping Peter and heading over to the coat rack just beside the door. In her hands she held out a thick black cloak. "Here. I don't want you getting sick." Peter shook his head. 

"Thank you ma'am, but I can't." _Mr.Stark would kill me if he saw me wearing that._ Pepper pressed the cloak into his hands. 

"Please. I hardly ever use this one." She was staring at him with such a motherly look that Peter nodded and slipped the cloak on. 

"Thank you." He hurried out the door, heading back to Mr. Stark's place.

_____________

Tony was asleep until he heard a knock on his office door. He bolted upright, almost flinging himself out of the chair. 

"Come in," he said, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. He was tired a lot lately, despite the four or five cups of coffee he drank throughout the day. 

Peter walked in carrying a white box that obscured half of his body. He set the box down and shook his head, flinging water off and onto the wall and floor. 

_Cute._ Tony’s mind unhelpfully said, before he shook the thought out and asked _What the fuck?_ He'd been having a lot of those thoughts lately. He hated it. It was like his brain was trying to sabotage him. 

"Sorry sir. I didn't mean to do that." Tony pulled himself out of his own head and looked over at the kid. He was soaked and dripping onto the carpet. He noticed the black cloak Peter had on as the man started to take it off. _He should take it all off._

Tony turned away again. He needed sleep, that's what it was. Maybe Pepper was right, the stress was getting to him. He ran his hands over his eyes to try to clear his head. 

_Stop thinking like that. You aren't gay._

"Leave." Peter froze. 

"Yes sir, I'm sorry."

Tony kept his hands over his eyes until he heard the door close and Peter's footsteps retreating down the steps.

He slept in his office that night.

* * *

**6 months ago**

Peter woke to the sound of his cell going off. He nearly dropped it when he saw Mr. Stark's name on the screen. Mr. Stark had not needed him in almost two months, despite Peter messaging him several times a day trying to get Mr. Stark to answer him. He answered, putting Mr. Stark on speaker, before looking around the room for appropriate clothes to wear. If Mr. Stark needed him now, he wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity to get back in the man’s good graces.

"Peterrrrr," Mr. Stark drawled. Peter stopped and looked quizzically at his phone. 

"Are you there? Is this a bad time?" Mr. Stark laughed. "I don't even know what time it is."

Peter held his phone back up to his face, only half-dressed and sure he was delirious. Mr. Stark had never cared what time of day it was; if he needed Peter to do something, he messaged him. 

"I'm here sir. Is there something you need me to do?"

"Yes,” Tony hiccuped, “I need you to get here." Peter placed his phone on the bed, engaging speakerphone before tugging on a random gray shirt he found.

"Where's here sir?" Mr. Stark laughed again, and the sound was carefree, drunk. Peter was almost dressed now, shoving his feet into sneakers and grabbing the cloak Pepper had given him. He had left it in Mr. Stark's office that day, expecting him to give it back to her. Instead, he saw it lying folded on a chair with a note attached that said 'Keep It.' Peter was ecstatic. It felt like Tony was finally warming up to him. That is, until they fought the next day and Mr. Stark dismissed him for good. 

"Mr. Stark, I need to know where you are at if you want me to come to you." All Peter heard on the other end was silence and what sounded like background music. Peter waited for several minutes before he sighed and hung up. He flopped back on the bed, closing his eyes, uncaring that he was fully clothed.

Peter had just started to drift off when he got a series of messages from Mr. Stark. One was an address and the other two read 'Here' and 'Now'. Peter scrambled up, slipped the cloak on, and headed out, sending 'Be right there sir' back to him and looking up the address Mr. Stark had sent. It was located 30 minutes away, just on the outskirts of downtown.

Peter ran as fast as he could, weaving through the crowd with surprising grace. The number of people out on a Wednesday night shocked Peter. Most people waited until the weekend. _Or maybe this is normal. You've never been out before, how would you know?_

Peter’s breath came in short pants by the time he arrived. He bent over to catch his breath and squinted up at the sign hanging over the door. _A club?_ He saw the cluster of people attempting to push each other out of the way in order to get to the front and get inside. He pulled out his phone and double-checked the address, sure he had gone to the wrong place. When Peter saw that the address Mr. Stark had sent him was most definitely the club he was standing in front of, he steeled himself and walked towards the bouncer guarding the door.

"Excuse me sir. My boss is inside and–" 

"Get lost kid." The bouncer gave him a look of annoyance, as if Peter was a nothing more than a bug. Peter clenched his hands into fists and was about to reply when he saw someone walk over to him. 

"Peter, thank god. I need your help." Pepper grabbed his arm, glared at the bouncer, and hauled him inside. 

Pepper dragged him through the mass of people crowding the bar and dance floor and over to a secluded section, masked in darkness. Mr. Stark was laying across a couch, legs draped over the side. 

"He won't leave and I don't know what to do." Pepper was gripping his arm tightly and biting the nails on her other hand. Mr. Stark's eyes were closed, but Peter couldn't tell if he was actually passed out or just relaxing.

"Mr. Stark?" Peter tentatively asked, pulling his arm away from Pepper and crouching down next to the seemingly passed out man so he was eye level with him. Mr. Stark opened one of his eyes and smiled. 

"Peter! You came..." He trailed off, closing his eye. Peter looked up at Pepper, who shrugged. 

"He's been asking for you all night." Peter's cheeks flushed at that.

Peter looked back at Mr. Stark and reached out a hand. He placed it on his shoulder and gently shook him, holding his breath. He had never touched Mr. Stark before. He had never even been close enough to do so. _You want to touch him though._ Peter shivered at his own thoughts. If Mr. Stark knew what he was thinking, he would fire him on the spot. 

Mr. Stark opened his eyes after Peter shook him harder. He quickly sat up and Peter scrambled away. 

"Don't ever touch me." Mr. Stark gave Peter a look of pure hatred. "Call Happy." 

The command was directed at Pepper but Mr. Stark continued to stare at Peter, his gaze never wavering. Pepper walked away, pulling out her phone and frantically punching in Happy's number. Peter was starting to sweat under the regard of Mr. Stark, but couldn't pull his gaze away. _His eyes are beautiful._ Thankfully it was dark in the club, otherwise Mr. Stark would have noticed Peter's skin turning red all over.

Mr. Stark and he continued to stare at each other until they heard Pepper. 

"–on his way", Peter heard, having not paid attention to when she had first started speaking. Mr. Stark laid back down and stared at the ceiling. By the time Happy arrived, he had completely passed out. 

_______________

_Peter looked amazing. He was meant to be on the dance floor, and Tony didn't want him to ever leave. Peter was wearing the same skin-tight jeans he had worn at his interview and was grinding on Tony like his life depended on it. Tony had grabbed his hips and ground back, his cock filling out as the movement gave him all the right friction–_

Tony woke up on the floor, tangled in his sheets. He was wearing last night's suit, but it was covered in dried vomit and stuck to him from the sweat. He realized he had been grinding against the carpet and now had a very noticeable boner pushing against the fabric of his slacks. He groaned. _What happened last night?_

He tried replaying the night in his head. He had been holed up in his office for a week, trying to work through a programming issue that was bugging out his computers. He really needed coffee, and was about to call Peter when he remembered that he had shut Peter out for a reason.

_He's distracting._

Tony had made no progress in his research, and it was all due to that kid. Peter was always ready to do whatever Tony wanted; called him sir, and mister. He blushed when he was addressed, _which was very cute,_ and ran around like an excited puppy all the time. Tony kept having thoughts jump into his mind that were not welcome. Thoughts of locking himself in a room with the boy and kissing him, and ripping off the clothes that still somehow framed him perfectly, despite them being baggy. 

_You're not some fag, get it together._ Howard’s voice was a constant, migraine-inducing presence these days. But his father had known that the CEO of a major corporation couldn’t just come out as gay. And Tony wasn’t gay. He wasn’t. 

He couldn't take it anymore, however, so he’d told Peter to leave and not come back unless he was needed.

Tony had to drink then, and he pulled out a single malt scotch from his extensive liquor cabinet and proceeded to finish it off in a sitting. It wasn’t enough, and when the bottle was empty, he decided to head downtown and find a club where he could drink himself into oblivion. He had thought the alcohol would clear his brain and make him stop thinking of Peter. He was wrong. The thoughts just got worse and he felt needy. 

_I need Peter Parker's lips on me. I need to see Peter. I need him._

He didn't remember arriving at the club, but remembered the strobe lights blinding him as he made his way over to the bar. He remembered ordering one shot, then two, then finally a whole round. His memory got fuzzy after that.

Tony sighed and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. _You're pathetic, he's an annoying lickspittle and you're hard for him? Get it together._

Tony took the coldest shower he could, hoping to wash away the shame he felt and make his erection go away. He climbed out, wrapped a towel around his waist, and looked at his phone. He stared at his call log in horror; he had called Peter last night. Peter had also left him a series of messages.

_I hope you made it back okay Mr. Stark._

_Do you need me today sir?_

_Have a great day Mr. Stark._

Tony stared at the second message and gripped his phone so tight that his knuckles went white. _Yes, I need you. I need you to–_ His thought was interrupted by Jarvis. "Mr. Stark, Ms. Potts is here to see you." Tony sighed and threw on some pants before heading downstairs.

_______________

Peter stood in Mr. Stark's living room, mouth open and eyes wide as he took everything in. The room was massive and the glass ceiling made it seem more so. He had never been anywhere else in Mr. Stark's house except his office and the basement where his lab was located. He wished he had been allowed to before, now that he was seeing how beautiful it was.

Mr. Stark descended the steps, clad in a pair of sweats, his hair wet and sticking to his face. _Holy fuck he's beautiful._ Peter blushed and minutely adjusted his legs to hide the slight tenting of his pants. 

Mr. Stark stopped in the middle of his descent. 

"What's the kid doing here?" He asked, his eyes narrowing as he looked at Peter. Peter moved to stand behind Pepper. 

"I brought him. You need him Tony. It's reasons like last night that I suggested you hire an assistant in the first place. You're stressed and–" 

"Last night had nothing to do with stress." Tony was now at the foot of the steps, but looked away from Peter. _Is he blushing?_ "If all you are here to do is yell at me for what happened, then I'm sorry, but you're going to have to leave." 

Pepper opened her mouth like she wanted to say something, but decided against it. She grabbed Peter by the arm and started walking him towards the door. 

"Wait." Mr. Stark's voice was soft. "Peter, I need to speak with you."

Pepper sighed, patted his arm, and headed out the door. Peter stood where he was, not wanting to turn around and look at Mr. Stark. 

"Care to tell me what happened last night?"

Peter continued to stare at the wall. "You, um, called me and asked me to meet you at the club. By the time I got there though, sir, you had passed out." Peter chose to tell the shorter version of the story, not wanting to dwell on the details of what Mr. Stark had said about him. He turned around, clenching his hands into fists to stop them from shaking. "Pepper called Happy and we brought you back here." He dared a look and found Mr. Stark staring at him as if he was disappointed. 

"Well then. You're dismissed for the day. I will message you tomorrow." Mr. Stark plopped down on one of the sofas and stretched out. Peter spun on his heels and left.

* * *

**4 months ago**

Tony didn't know how it had happened.

Peter had jumped right back into his job, even more enthused than he had been originally, and Tony had started to enjoy his presence, though he could never admit it to himself. He hadn't had a single inappropriate thought about Peter in weeks, not since he had started shagging Pepper. She had happily obliged when he had approached her, and they took every opportunity available to indulge each other. Tony was happy, satisfied. 

But then Peter walked in, dressed in tight jeans and equally tight button-up, and Tony lost the battle with his mind. 

"Mr. Stark, I'm sorry for coming in today, but this file needs your signature and–" Tony cut him off by slamming his lips onto Peter's. 

Tony felt Peter go stiff, and he pulled away. 

Tony blinked for a couple seconds. _What just happened?_ Peter was blushing hard and Tony cursed under his breath. 

"Leave." Tony’s voice was barely louder than a whisper. Peter dropped the file and sprinted out of the room.

Tony punched the wall, then messaged Pepper and told her to come over. 

________________

Peter sprinted the entire way home. _Mr. Stark just kissed you._ He couldn't stop thinking about it, and his thoughts skittered down his spine and landed low in his belly, hot and uncomfortable..

When Peter was finally home and in the safety of his bedroom, overwhelmed, he sat on his bed and cried.

* * *

**3 months ago**

Peter was surprised he hadn't been dismissed after what happened last month. Mr. Stark had messaged him the next day telling him to come in, and they never spoke of the incident again.

Mr. Stark often told him to leave and Peter tried to keep his presence to a minimum, but he was glad he still had a job and Mr. Stark hadn't screamed at him. 

_He kissed you, though. Why would he yell at you?_ Peter didn't have an answer.

Mr. Stark was waiting for Peter in the lobby when Peter arrived. "I want to show you the lab."

Peter nearly dropped the coffee he was carrying. 

"Yes, sir." Peter cursed himself for answering like that; it wasn’t a yes or no question. Mr. Stark sighed and motioned for Peter to follow him. 

Peter marveled at how big the room was. The one time he had been here it had been nearly empty. Now, it was filled with so many machines and computers that Peter was surprised the city still had electricity. 

"I think it's time you actually assist me with my research, since that is technically what I hired you for." Mr. Stark looked back at him and smirked. 

"Thank you, Mr. Stark." Peter couldn't stop looking around the room. It was as if every time he found something, five more fascinating gadgets popped up in its place. 

"You won't be doing much, just configurations and such, but I'm tired of you doing nothing." Peter smiled at Mr. Stark. 

"Thank you so much sir, I will do whatever you need me to–" 

"Yeah, that's great." Peter couldn't tell, but he thought Mr. Stark's face was turning red. _It's hot._

"And you can stop calling me that. Just call me Tony. Please." Mr. Stark-Tony- never said please. He was never nice to Peter. _What's going on with him?_

Peter nodded to Tony. 

"Do you need anything from me si–", he cut himself off, his cheeks flushing. Tony’s lips were curling up, like he knew a secret Peter didn’t.

 _Huh?_

"Yes, actually." Tony walked towards him and stopped inches from him. He leaned down, his eyes boring into Peter's. 

_Please kiss me._

_"_ Leave." Tony dropped his expression and left the room, leaving Peter standing in the middle of the lab, hot and shaky.

__________

Tony had almost kissed him again. 

_You're not gay. You aren’t._

He had caught himself and dismissed Peter. He wanted to be nowhere near him. Tony stormed up to his office and slammed the door, almost throwing it off its hinges. 

_Get yourself together._

He could feel his erection straining against his pants, and he punched the wall. He was not going to get off because of Peter. 

_But you want to._

Tony punched the wall again, his knuckles turned red and throbbing. His erection was still very much there. 

_Just deal with it._

Tony gave in. He sat behind his desk and pulled his cock out, trying to focus on the last time Pepper and he had fucked. Instead, he wondered what Peter's cock would look like against his, Tony's hand sliding around both, using their precum to smooth the way. He imagined Peter's eyes blown wide with shock, gasping Tony's name. He came then, hard and emptying, thoughts of Peter swimming in his head.

_Fuck you._

* * *

**2 months ago**

Peter had been into Tony's lab almost every day for the past month. His jobs were minimal, just turning knobs and typing a few things into the various computers, but Peter loved it. Tony was a much different person in the lab. He was happy here, floating around and putting his brain to work. 

_He's absolutely gorgeous while he works._

Peter couldn't stop thinking about Mr. Stark, not since he had kissed him two months ago. He still hated himself for not kissing back, for freezing. He was glad Tony had made him wear loose clothes, because Peter went through most days with a semi-hardon now that he was with Tony more. 

Peter tried to focus on the code Mr. Stark wanted him to punch in, but Tony was making it hard. He had taken off his shirt, claiming it was too constricting and was pacing around the lab, clearly frustrated. Peter wanted to offer to help, but anytime he even said a word, Mr. Stark yelled at him and dismissed him for the rest of the day. Peter just chalked it up to Tony's horrible sleep patterns and the stress of his research. He was supposed to give a big presentation next month, and Peter could tell that Tony was getting nowhere.

Peter turned away from the computer, stealing a glance at his shirtless boss. His gaze lingered a little too long, and before he could turn away, Mr. Stark looked up and met his eyes. Peter blushed furiously and felt his dick give a little jolt of interest. Tony stared back at Peter with such force that Peter thought he would combust right there. 

"Enjoying the view?" Peter couldn't look away and felt his hands get clammy. 

"N–n–no, sorry sir, I–I was just–" He couldn't form a sentence. He was shaking and hard, his cock tenting his pants. 

"Oh, really? Cause here I was thinking you were hard because of me." Tony had that secretive, lazy smile again. .

Peter couldn't even think. His and Tony's gazes were locked, and Tony stalked towards him, so slowly that Peter barely registered it. Tony appeared in front of him and leaned down to Peter's level. 

_Please just kiss me. I'll do anything._

"Please," Peter croaked out, not realizing he had spoken. He had already opened his mouth in an apology, but was cut off by Tony's lips on his, kissing him with such desperation, Peter felt consumed. He immediately kissed back this time, not wanting to waste this moment. 

Tony grabbed the back of Peter's head, tangling his hand in his hair and tugging, forcing him to look up. Tony then trailed kisses down his jaw and neck, working his way up and down both sides of Peter.

Peter's body was on fire. He felt every kiss like it was a brand, burning his skin and leaving marks. Peter wanted this moment to last forever. He grabbed onto Tony's shoulders just so he would have an anchor against the onslaught. Tony tugged his shirt up, his hands grazing over Peter's stomach and back as he worked it off of him. Tony tossed the shirt somewhere in the room, and pulled Peter up, back into a searing kiss. Peter pressed his body up against Tony and felt the hard length of him pressed tight against the fabric of his pants. When they broke the kiss for air, Tony placed his hand on Peter's shoulders and pushed down, making Peter fall to his knees. Peter yelped at the impact, but when he saw that he was eye-level with Tony's crotch, the pain vanished. 

"Well? Get to work," Tony panted, his hand on Peter's head.

Peter wasted no time in freeing Tony's cock from his pants, holding it in his hands, and admiring it. 

_It's so fucking big._

He ran his tongue over the tip, which elicited a moan, which bolstered Peter’s confidence. He licked stripes up and down the shaft, wanting to draw this out, but Tony gripped his hair and yanked him back. 

"Stop teasing or I'll leave," Tony said through gritted teeth. Peter gulped and proceeded to take Tony into his mouth, gagging at the halfway mark.

_How is his dick so big?_

Tony groaned above him and tightened his grip in Peter's hair. With the other hand, he clutched Peter’s jaw before pushing Peter's mouth farther down onto him until he was fully inside, Peter's nose pressed against him. 

Peter could feel his eyes prick with tears and he had to swallow convulsively so as not to gag. Tony didn't move for a moment and Peter started to panic at not being able to breathe. Tony relaxed his hold on Peter's hair in time for Peter to pull off and suck in as much air as he could before he got back to work. He bobbed his head and listened to Tony moan above him. He was painfully hard now, and he reached one of his hands down to stroke himself, needing relief. It didn't take Peter long to come, and the muffled moan that reverberated around Tony’s cock made him groan and spill down Peter's throat. Greedy, he swallowed all of it.

Peter was abruptly pushed off of Tony, and Tony quickly pulled his pants up, a look of terror in his eyes. 

"Leave. Grab your shit and get out." Peter tried not to let the hurt show in his face as he grabbed his shirt and stormed out of the lab. 

Peter was still horribly aroused, even after Mr. Stark had driven him away. He supposed he was used to the treatment, even if he still cried himself to sleep.

______________

Tony fucked Pepper that night, but when he came, he was thinking of Peter's perfect pink lips.

* * *

**1 month ago**

Tony had to fight his urge to kiss Peter on a daily basis. He had debated just firing the boy, but he had to admit, he needed the help around the lab. Peter had proven himself useful, and with his biggest presentation just a week away, he was glad he was around. 

_You like the view as well._ Somewhere along the line, the voice of Howard he carried in his head had given birth to the devil on his shoulder. The one that encouraged him to take from Peter what he wanted. 

Tony took a swig of the rum that he carried everywhere now. The constant buzz was the only way to keep himself flaccid and his mind off of the thoughts he kept having regarding Peter. 

_You're turning into a fucking fairy._ Howard whispered in his ear. 

Tony slammed the bottle down on the table, which caused Peter to fall out of his chair in shock. He stood up and looked at Tony, worry etched on his face. 

"Is everything okay Mr. Stark?" Peter had gone back to calling him Mr. Stark after their little rendezvous last month, and Tony gritted his teeth every time he said it. 

"Fine," was all Tony was capable of saying. He was furious with having to hold himself back. The alcohol was making his lust and anger mix, and he was scared of himself; he didn't know what he would do to himself, or to Peter. 

_Just give in, you want him._ Tony was taking deep breaths as Peter made his way across the room toward him. 

"Mr. Stark, how much have you had to drink today? Should I call Pepper?" Peter had pulled his phone out of his pocket and was dialing Pepper's number. Tony knocked the phone out of his hands and it shattered on the floor. Peter gasped and stepped back, his eyes tearing up.

"You will not call anyone." Peter nodded, and Tony assumed it was because he was too scared to move. 

Tony’s lips crashed into Peter's. Peter resisted for a moment, but then kissed him back. He crowded Peter until his thighs hit a table. Peter was kissing back hotly, shoving his tongue into Tony's mouth. Tony moaned and put his hands on Peter's ass, grabbing and kneading it. Peter bucked his hips forward, grinding his length against Tony's. Tony moved his mouth to Peter's neck and bit down, a gasp escaping from Peter. Peter squirmed under him, but Tony had him pinned down against the table, not allowing for much movement. He could feel Peter's skin getting hot and his erection was rubbing against him, making Tony moan and throw his hips forward, chasing the friction.

"Get down," Tony whispered into Peter's ear. The smaller man’s knees hit the floor with a thud, but Peter didn't even flinch. He fumbled with Tony's belt and yanked his achingly hard cock out. Peter wasted no time shoving him down his throat, working his tongue on him like it was his sole purpose to pleasure Tony. 

"Fuck..." Tony was unraveling. He was trying to hold on, trying to enjoy this feeling as much as he could, but the alcohol coursing through his veins made it hard to control his body. It only took a few bobs of Peter's head before he was coming with a whine down his throat. Peter swallowed as much as he could, some of it spilling out of his mouth and running down his chin. 

_This is the most beautiful sight in the world._

Peter stood up and wiped the cum off his chin, pink with embarrassment and avoiding Tony’s eyes. He turned around and started walking back to his computer, but Tony grabbed his arm and spun him around. He pressed Peter against a wall and shoved his hand down his pants. Peter gasped and flung his head back, hitting the wall with a dull thud. Tony planted kisses along his neck, leaving a few bite marks as he did. Tony wanted to mark him up, make him his. Peter didn't last long, cumming into Tony's fist with a whimper. Tony pulled his hand out, pulling Peter in for a long, slow kiss.

"I should go." Peter was panting and scrambled to get his stuff together. Tony heard a sniffle and he bunched his hands into fists. 

_You fucked up._ Peter sprinted from the room, his shirt partially untucked, and cheeks flushed. 

Tony punched the wall. He wanted the fact that he had just engaged in sex with a man to feel worse than it did. He waited and waited for that gut wrenching guilt, the anger. Instead he felt ashamed at the look on Peter’s face as he left the room.

* * *

**3 weeks ago**

Peter felt Tony's eyes on him at all times, and he left work every day with his cock half-hard in his pants. Tony had kissed him only a few times, but they were strained and felt as if Tony was trying to distance himself from the kiss.

Peter sighed and came into his hand for the second time that day, thinking of Tony's hand working him in his lab last week. 

_Think of ANYTHING else Peter._ But he couldn't. 

No amount of porn compared to that day. He still had the fading marks on his neck and he ran his hand over them, a smile creeping onto his face.

____________

Tony's big presentation was here and he had barely finished his speech in time, writing the last notecard in the car. He didn't know why he was so nervous, it wasn't like this was his first speech. Maybe it was due to the fact that he hadn't made nearly enough progress, not since he had been... distracted.

Happy pulled up in front of the college and he stepped out, meeting Pepper and Peter at the front doors. 

"You got this Mr. Stark." Tony smiled. Peter had dressed up for the occasion, wearing a perfectly tailored suit that hugged his body in all the right places. Peter was beaming at him. 

_He's so cute. And the way he smiles–_ Tony sighed, forcing the thought out of his head. He didn't need to be thinking about Peter right now, not when he was about to give one of the biggest speeches of his life. 

"Yeah, thanks kid. Can you guys just take a seat?" Peter looked slightly disappointed but followed Pepper into the auditorium. 

Tony only had time to run through his speech once before he was being ushered on stage.

Tony walked out to a loud applause, but the lights were so bright in his face that he couldn't see anyone in the audience. He breathed, smiled, and started. 

"Stark Industries has always strived to push the boundaries of what is possible and create new solutions to problems that have yet to arise. We want to be the leaders in technology and discovery." Tony looked up and flashed his award-winning smile at the crowd. He could see the front row start to come into view, his eyes having adjusted to the lights. Peter and Pepper were in the front row and Peter was smiling at him. Tony met his eyes and Peter beamed, then nodded his head.

"Which is why I'm very proud to announce that we have made significant progress in our search for sustainable, infinitely renewable energy. I have discovered a new element that, when activated, could power a city with just a few grams. This element-"

____________

Peter was filled with so much adoration for the man on stage and didn't stop grinning for the entire speech. 

_He's so sexy when he's confident._ Peter blushed at the thought, but couldn't look away. 

"I am grateful for the company’s support of my research and next time I see you, we’ll have solved the energy crisis. Thank you!"

The auditorium erupted in applause, which led to a standing ovation, led by Peter. Tony smiled, bowed, then exited. Peter ran out of the auditorium and met Mr. Stark in the dark hallway behind the stage. Mr. Stark looked startled, but before Peter could launch into his speech about how amazing Mr. Stark was, Tony grabbed him, kissing him roughly. Peter kissed back with equal eagerness, but Tony pulled away too soon. He brushed Peter off and walked out into the lobby. Peter could barely concentrate on the ride home; he was euphoric. He didn't notice he was home until Pepper shook him and informed him that they had been sitting in front of his building for several minutes.

Tony told Peter to come in early the next day so he could help with some technical problems on one of the machines. Peter was groggy and sore from the night before. He had stayed up late, fisting himself in his hand until he had come three times while replaying Tony's speech in his head. He was terrified that Mr. Stark would notice his performance issues. 

Tony looked up from his position on the floor, arm deep in the particle reactor. Peter wiped the sleep out of his eyes and walked over to Mr. Stark. Tony stood up and his arm was caked in mechanical lube. 

_Shit._ Peter could already feel himself getting aroused at the sight of Mr. Stark's arm. 

"You're small and I can't get my hand up in there. I need you to reattach the wires." Tony turned away and busied himself on the computer, never once looking over at Peter while his arm was shoved in the machine. It wasn't hard to reattach the wires and Peter wondered if Tony was just trying to humiliate him by making him get his arm all greasy, just to send him home. Peter sighed at the thought and removed his arm, standing up and facing Tony. He cleared his throat when Tony refused to look back at him. Mr. Stark turned around finally, his eyes moving up and down Peter's body. 

"Great, thanks. You can leave now –" 

"I need to wash this off." Tony narrowed his eyes at him, and he looked annoyed that Peter had talked back to him. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Tony waved him off. 

"Fine, the bathroom is down the hall."

Peter cleaned the grease off of his hand and looked at himself in the mirror. His eyes were bloodshot and his neck and face were red with his arousal. He had to do something; this back and forth was getting out of control. He couldn’t face going home without doing _something._

_You're weak for him._

Peter charged back into the lab, and when he reached the desk he grabbed the front of Tony's shirt. 

"All you do is use me and push me away like I'm some toy you can just toss to the side when you don't need it anymore." He was surprised by the boldness in his voice. "Figure out if you want me or not because I can't take this anymore." 

Tears pricked his eyes and he looked away from Tony, releasing his shirt. He stepped back, tears threatening to spill down his cheeks. The fire that had been in him just a few seconds before had banked, sputtering down under the weight of what he’d said. 

"I quit." 

____________

Tony couldn't move. His arms hung slack at his sides and his knees were weak. Peter walked out of the lab again, and though he was being quiet, Tony could tell he was crying. 

_Go after him._

_Stay here._

Tony was at war with himself. 

Peter was out of the lab by the time Tony pulled himself together. He darted out of the room and up the stairs, wanting to find Peter as fast as he could. The kid wasn't upstairs, so Tony ran outside, forgetting that he wasn't wearing shoes. He spotted the mess of brown hair at the end of the driveway, running. 

"Peter!" Tony called out. Peter stopped and turned around. 

Tony walked to where Peter was and pulled him into a crushing hug. Peter wailed against his chest, his body shaking with the force of the sobs. 

"Please don't quit. I–" 

_Need you._

He held Peter until he stopped crying, then held him some more.

* * *

**1 week ago**

Tony had been overly attentive to him for the past two weeks. He kept apologizing to Peter and kissed him often. Tony never took it farther than a make-out session though, and Peter guessed he was holding back, too scared of Peter leaving again. 

Peter hadn't said a word to Tony since he had stormed out on him. He didn't know what he was supposed to say. He wanted to apologize, but he was too scared of what Tony would do. The man was unstable. Peter could taste the alcohol on his lips every time they kissed, and Peter could guess what he would find if he opened up Tony's liquor cabinet. Tony hadn't shaved in weeks, making his previous stubble fill out into a beard. His hair was always a mess, instead of being cut and groomed like it usually was.

Peter kept himself busy with Tony's research, trying to keep his mind as far from Tony as he could. He barely kissed Tony back most days, when all he wanted to do was trace the outline of Tony’s mouth with his own, and lick into his mouth.

He left work everyday achingly hard and angry from lust. 

He came every night to thoughts of Tony swimming through his mind. 

They were filthy thoughts. _Tony's mouth around his dick, sucking him dry. Tony bending him over a lab table and taking him as his own. Tony's voice whispering sweet nothings in his ear in the lab._

He always cried himself to sleep and woke up hating himself.

____________

Tony was wasted. The bottles of tequila were scattered around him. He had just slept with Pepper, but when he went soft halfway through, he had broken down in front of her, picked a fight, and proceeded to end their relationship right there. After, he began to drink until everything was one big blur. He hadn't been this drunk since that night at the club, when he drunk-dialed Peter. 

_Peter. I need him._ Tony tried to call Peter again, but eventually gave up, instead asking JARVIS to call Peter for him. 

"Hello? Tony?" Tony groaned at his voice. He banged the wall with his fists, not even noticing the blood dripping from his knuckles. 

"Mr. Stark, is everything okay?" Tony was too drunk to form a full sentence. 

"Need.." Tony tried, his tongue feeling heavy in his throat. 

"I'm sorry Mr. Stark, I can't hear you. Are you okay?" 

_No, you're not. You're getting hard just from his voice._

Tony reached down and palmed his rapidly growing erection. 

"Talk," Tony said as he slumped against the wall. 

"Talk? I don't understand." Tony's hand was now wrapped around his cock, stroking it. 

"Just– talk to me" Tony breathed out, moving his hand faster on himself. 

"Um, Tony? What's going on?" Tony couldn't respond. The alcohol and lust were rendering him incapable of speech. 

"Oh, shit. Tony, are you drunk again?" He hated that Peter said again. Hated that Peter had to see him like this, drunk and pining after him. 

"I need–", Tony swallowed. "N–need you." He heard Peter's sharp inhale.

"Tony." Peter's voice was strained. "Are you, um, touching yourself?" Tony could feel the burn building and he sped up. 

"Yes."

Tony heard silence on the other line. He was teetering on the end of bliss, he just needed Peter's voice to push him over the edge. 

"Please." Tony's voice was high pitched and breathy. He heard shuffling on the other line and waited for several minutes for Peter to talk to him. He was about to hang up when the sound finally came from the other end. 

"Tony." Peter's breathing was heavy and it was delicious. Tony was close. He pumped himself as fast as he could, and came with a loud moan at the same time he heard Peter shout. 

"Fuck, Mr. Stark". Tony didn't hang up the phone. He just sank to the ground and passed out.

* * *

**Now**

Peter never brought up the other night. He didn't even know if Tony would remember what had happened. Tony seemed more agitated now. He was jumping at every sound and the one time Peter had touched him, he had balled up a fist and swung, stopping himself before he actually hit Peter.

Peter had ignored it and focused back on the last few bits of code he had to type in. It was already dark out and he could hear the rain beating against the windows. He flinched when he heard Tony punch the wall close to him. 

"Tony, what the hell!" Peter spun around in his chair and was met with the piercing eyes of Mr. Stark, just a few feet away. 

"Stop fucking punching the wall. I'm trying to do work. Your work, I might add. So shut the fuck up." Peter spun back around, but looked over his shoulder, suddenly upset. "Please."

Tony was on him in a second, lips crashing into Peter’s, hungry. 

Tony had never kissed him like this before. 

His tongue was already exploring Peter’s mouth and his hand was tangled in Peter’s hair, yanking. When Tony bit down on his lip, drawing blood, Peter keened. Tony then went back to devouring his mouth, exploring every inch with his tongue. That was all it took for Peter to grab Tony's neck and pull him closer; he wanted Mr. Stark's body pressed against him. 

Tony tugged on the hem of Peter's shirt, pulling it up and off of him. He swept kisses down Peter's neck, bitting down on his collarbone. Peter moaned and tightened his grip on Tony's hair. 

"Fuck." Peter ran his hands down Tony's back and settled them on his ass, cupping it in his hands. Tony bit down harder and Peter yelped, pushing his hips up into Tony. Tony's hand snaked down and slid over the waistband of Peter's pants, and Peter arched his back, hoping to get closer. 

"Let's move to my room," Tony whispered into Peter's ear. Peter's cock twitched in desire.

Tony dragged Peter up the stairs, on him as soon as they were through the door to his room. Tony attacked his throat again, biting and sucking with rough abandon. Peter was squirming and bucking his hips against Tony. 

"Please." Peter didn't know what he was begging for, he just wanted Tony to touch him. Tony moaned against Peter's neck and slipped his hand down Peter's pants. Peter placed his wrists on Tony's shoulders and relaxed, giving himself completely over to Tony.

Tony pulled Peter's pants down and grabbed his cock, all in one motion. Peter was squirming and moaning, wild with sensation. 

"I've barely even touched you. Are you always this much of a slut?" Peter gripped Tony's shirt and inched it up, asking. Tony removed his lips from Peter's neck and yanked his shirt off. He started unbuckling his pants, and before he could pull them down, Peter dropped to his knees, taking Tony’s pants with him. He took Tony in his mouth, skipping the foreplay, because all he wanted was to please Tony. Tony gripped his head with both hands, guiding him, but not taking charge. 

_He's letting you do this. He wants you to do it._

Peter bobbed his head on Tony's cock, paying special attention to the head, loving the way it made Tony groan above him.

He felt Tony's hands clench and knew he was close. Peter sped up his motions, but after a few seconds, he was pulled up to his feet. Tony pushed him back onto the bed and climbed on top of him. He started to kiss down Peter's chest, gazing up at him. Peter was trying to stay propped up on his elbows but he was shaking from the feeling of Tony roving up and down his thighs, teasing him. 

"Please." That was the only word he could form; his brain was mush. Tony took him in his mouth and Peter collapsed onto the bed, moaning and lost in the sensation of Tony blowing him. 

"C–close. Fuck, Please" Tony pulled off him and Peter bucked his hips upwards, trying to chase the feeling of Tony's mouth. 

Tony moved up and kissed his cheek, whispering into his ear. 

"I need you." Peter didn't have time to prepare for Tony's cock pushing into him. It burned and stretched, but while it felt like being ripped from the inside, he knew he would acclimate. It didn't stop the tears streaming down his face.

"Oh Peter." Tony pressed himself all the way inside. 

_It hurts so much. Please don't stop._

Tony sat still for a moment, letting Peter adjust. Peter's breathing slowed as his body got used to the intrusion, and he pulled Tony into a kiss to let him know he was ready. Tony kissed him for a few more moments before he leaned up and began pounding into Peter. Peter moaned and tightened his grip on Tony, fingers digging into his back. 

Tony picked Peter’s hips up and the new angle made him brush against Peter's prostate. 

"Fuck", Peter called out, his back arching off the bed. Tony was groaning and hammering into him relentlessly, desperate for release. 

"Close," Peter choked out. He moved a hand to Tony's neck and pulled him down. As soon as Tony's lips touched his, he shuddered and came, spilling onto his stomach. Tony came after a few more thrusts, collapsing on top of Peter from the force of his orgasm.

Tony slid out and off of him, but pulled Peter to him, wrapping his arms around his waist.

They fell asleep, wrapped up in each other, high in a post-sex haze.

__________

Tony woke up in a cold sweat, Peter's body pressed against him, breathing heavily. 

_You had sex with him. You fucked up._

Tony climbed out of bed, threw the first clothes he could find on, and called Happy. 

"I need you to get the car here as fast as you can. I don't care what time it is. Just get me out of this fucking city."

He frantically packed a suitcase, not caring what he was grabbing.

 _Leave. Leave. Leave_. 

"Mr. Stark? Is everything okay?" Peter wiped his eyes and started to climb out of bed. He hadn't realized Peter had woken up. Tony walked into the bathroom and closed the door. _How could you fuck that little twink? You're filthy._

Tony ran a hand through his hair, staring at himself in the mirror before storming out. 

___________

Peter saw Tony blow out the door with a suitcase. He scrambled out of bed, threw on the first piece of clothing he touched, and ran after him. He bounded down the stairs and saw Tony descending, almost like he was running from Peter. 

"Tony, what's wrong? Is it me?" Tony didn't look at him, just stared ahead and made his way towards the door. Peter ran ahead and stepped in front of Tony. 

"Please, Tony, I'm–" Tony pushed him out of the way.

Peter could feel the tears already falling, but he kept pleading with Tony. 

"Tony, I'm sorry. Whatever it is, I'm sorry. Just– please don't leave." They had made it to the front door and Tony still hadn't looked at him. Tony walked out the door and Peter saw a car pulling up with Happy in the driver's seat. Peter was frozen. 

_How can he be leaving?_

He was barely holding it together. He stepped outside and called after Tony while bounding down the front steps. 

"Tony, please."

* * *

**2 weeks later (Epilogue?)**

Peter had spent the last two weeks in his room, crying. He had received several messages from Pepper asking if everything was okay, but he couldn't bring himself to explain what had happened. 

_Tony had sex with you and then left._

He couldn't stop thinking about it. He hadn't taken off the shirt he had thrown on that night because it was Tony's and it still smelled like him. 

_Tony had sex with you then left._ Tears fell down Peter's cheeks, spilling onto the already wet pillow.

There was a knock at the door. Peter remained in bed, not wanting to leave his cocoon of wallowing. The person knocked again, harder this time. 

Peter still didn't get up. 

"Peter, it's Tony."

Peter went rigid. 

_Why is he here? He hates you._

"One s–second." Peter trembled and pushed himself to his feet. He walked out of his room and wiped his cheeks, trying to clear his face of sorrow before he opened the door. He took a deep breath and pulled the door open, hating what he saw immediately. 

Tony looked just as undone as Peter. His hair was unkempt and now brushing his collar, his clothes were wrinkled and his eyes were bloodshot. Peter couldn't bring himself to say anything. 

He just stared at Tony and waited.

"Peter, I'm so sorry. I–." Tony looked away from him, breathing heavily. 

"Can I come in?" Peter nodded and backed away, allowing Tony to come in just enough to close the door behind him. Tony looked at Peter and sighed shakily. 

“I'm sorry Peter. I've been downright awful to you. There's no excuse. But, I've hated myself. I learned at my father's knee that it wasn't acceptable to be gay. And I didn't want to accept that he must have always known, that I've always known... what I am. I kept telling myself it was wrong, that you were wrong–"

"You think I'm wrong?"

"No, Peter–"

"You should leave."

"Just listen, please. You're perfect. You're everything I want, everything good in this world. And I've treated you terribly, but I– I've given in. I can't stay away from you. I can't be anything other than what I am, and I don't care what my father would have thought. If you want me... If you want me, I'm here. I'm sorry. I know I fucked up. But please, I need you."

Peter peeled his eyes away from Tony, not wanting the man to watch him cry. Tony stepped forward again, but this time Peter didn't back away. Tony now stood within arms reach of Peter. _You want him._ He did. He wanted him more than anything. He looked back at Tony and wrapped him in a hug. He felt the tension leaving Tony's body and Tony brought his arms around Peter, hugging him back tightly. 

"I'm so sorry." Peter didn't want to listen to Tony. He tilted his head up and kissed him.

________

When Tony sunk into Peter, he tried to pour everything he wanted to say into it. Every ‘sorry’, every ‘I need you’, every ‘please.’ When they were spent, Peter curled in his arms and fell asleep. 

For the first time, Howard was silent. 

_I need him. I really need him._


End file.
